Funny People – HBO Comedy East – 8:00 p.m. EST
QUOTE: “You’re my best friend, and I don’t even like you.”
ACTORS: Adam Sandler, Seth Rogan, Jonah Hill, Leslie Mann, Eric Bana.
REASON TO WATCH: An Accurate portrayal of the Stand-up world.
Blow – FX – 8:00 p.m. EST
QUOTE: “It was the greatest feeling I ever had. Followed abruptly by the worst feeling I ever had.”
ACTORS: Johnny Depp, Penélope Cruz.
REASON TO WATCH: Last movie directed by Ted Demme.
Strange Days – Fox Movie Channel – 8:00 p.m. EST
QUOTE: “Cheer up. The world’s about to end in ten minutes anyway.”
ACTOR: Ralph Fiennes.
REASON TO WATCH: James Cameron wrote the screenplay.
Mean Girls – TBS – 8:00 p.m. EST
QUOTE: “I’m sorry that people are so jealous of me… but I can’t help it that I’m so popular.”
ACTORS: Lindsay Lohan, Rachel McAdams, Amanda Seyfried, Tina Fey, Amy Poehler.
REASON TO WATCH: To laugh at Lindsay Lohan in a movie and not in real life.
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles – HBO Family West – 5:45 p.m. EST
QUOTE: “God, I LOVE *BEING A TURTLE*!”
ACTOR: Elias Koteas.
REASON TO WATCH: Mutant turtles.
Mission: Impossible III – TNT -1:30 p.m. EST
QUOTE: “DO YOU THINK I’M PLAYING?”
ACTORS: Tom Cruise, Philip Seymour Hoffman, Ving Rhames, Maggie Q, Simon Pegg, Laurence Fishburne.
REASON TO WATCH: Opening scene.
Assassins – Reelz Channel – 4:00 p.m. EST
QUOTE: “Honey? I’m going to tear your heart out.”
ACTORS: Sylvester Stallone, Antonio Banderas, Julianne Moore.
REASON TO WATCH: Wachowski brothers wrote the film.